Thursday, November 7, 2013

Trials in Grace

So, it never seems to fail.... when God has me focus on Grace or teaches me something new about Grace or reminds me again how I need to show Grace... It seems like WHAM.... something happens very quickly after these thoughts on grace & but I seem to of already forgotten.... and sometimes i'll even remember some of these thoughts & think, "I need to show grace but also think... I dont want to!" So, that's what happed this past Sat. after working Friday night, i was tired needless to say with a few hours of sleep after work & my husband was stressed out & grouchy.... that wasnt so bad... we had a bday party & it was lots of fun & the day came & went but before bed... tempers began to flare a little.... not bad really but i think in both of our exhaustion..... Grace went right out the window..... GRACE... What is that????? I definately fought the idea of grace.... this week though i've been reminded of Jesus & the Sermon on the Mount when He talked about trying to take the speck out of someone's eye when you have a log in yours.... well that was the case.... It's amazing how one moment you can think things are going pretty good & the next a "fight or flight" in you comes out... & for me it was thoughts of "flight".... not a great place to be really.... Well, even in my husband's sleep as I crawled into bed (determined I would not get in the bed if he hadnt put the sheets on.... but he had & my heart warmed just a little because I really wanted to sleep in my bed!)... He apologized (and this time he wasnt talking in his sleep!) & I did too.... & a NEW day began again... this time with fresh apologies & as the day went along we talked about our thoughts & struggles.... One thing I learned... our crazy & exhausting schedules need a change so that we are laying in the Hands of God & trusting His plan for our family! I struggle with my husbands schedule as he seems to have his hands in everything... with 3-4 jobs including the responsibilities of church.... And I'm thankful as the week has gone by that he has had his cell phone off more than the last few weeks during our evening time as a family! And God is definately working in my heart as well as I learn more to ask, seek & knock.... not for material things but that my life would be conformed to Christ's character... that I would long for Heaven & be a godly wife & mother my family needs me to be! he is showing me my mission field right now is here within my home and though it may be overwhelming at times it's important & He will help me through it!!! Trying to learn to ponder HIS Grace & remember when I'm ready to lash out... look for faults that I'll first see the my own faults & remember the CROSS & how God forgave me & showed me His GRACE!!!! That maybe one day I'll become a woman known for Grace.... One who loves God, His Redemption, my adoption in Him, who ponders on how He CAME from His Heavenly home to save me (US!) & His Love is EVERLASTING! :) God's Redeeming Adoption Comes Everlasting :)

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